Despite my earlier catty comment, I want my wife to be OK. And I do think she's making a mistake. I emailed her asking if she were OK, saying I'd heard something surprising; she emailed back asking what I'd heard. I told her what I'd heard and said I was concerned since she'd told me she wanted to find herself and it was hard to do that in a relationship, especially a submissive one. She told me she was OK and promised she'd tell me if she wasn't.
So, I think that's the best I can do. I'm sure it's a mistake, but at least there aren't immediately obvious problems. And who knows, sometimes mistakes in judgement lead to happy consequences; just because you pick a guy at the wrong time doesn't automatically mean you get the wrong guy. I wish her luck.
I do really want the damn divorce finalized, though.