Wednesday, April 27, 2011


The woman I sent the break-up email to turned out to have a really good reason for leaving her husband that does not leave him a good man in my opinion at all; she just hadn't wanted to talk about it. So, there's still three.

I feel like an ungrateful asshole because I'm agonizing over the fact I've got three girlfriends (all of whom know I have other girlfriends). How many guys would love to have this problem? But, it genuinely bugs me more than loneliness did.

I must be a very inefficient person. I am totally exhausted and badly short on sleep from my 8-hr-a-day job, the commute, and the dates. Saturday I'm not planning to meet anyone (except maybe my acupuncturist) or do anything (except maybe get accurately punctured), and I'm so looking forward to it.


  1. I can't really relate on the multiple girlfriends at once thing. HH and I knew and fell hard for each-other pretty quickly and completely for some reasons that are difficult to believe. As to making up your mind take time pray and meditate to listen for the present tense voice of God.

    Stay honest in all things and you'll eventually find the right girl.

  2. Jeez. I'm exhausted with one boyfriend, one crush, school and trying to keep my hobbies going at least a little. I can't imagine dating three people, unless I got seriously good time management skills.

  3. Odysseus, welcome! Yeah, Saturday I want to take some time to pray and meditate. (Also vacuum.)

    Ozymandias, hmm, maybe I'm being too hard on myself. I know people who work 60-80 hours a week, so I feel like a whiner for being so exhausted with 40 and three dates. But not many people do that.

  4. I don't mean to dis but you whine too much sometimes. If you lived in the Old Testament times three girlfriends that knew about each other would be a nice start to a decent little family. Don't be so serious. Keep to your principles and have a good time. You'll invariably grow closer to one than the other two. If the other two don't see it the same way then it will get really awkward. :P Honestly though I'm impressed that you've got that kind of romantic life so soon after a divorce. Plenty of guys out there wouldn't be able to get back on the horse after being single for years.

  5. Yeah, maybe I ought to leave more up to time and my heart.

  6. I couldn't keep up three relationships... But I'm wondering, why are you? Are you being honest to yourself about your feelings? It's just that in my case I've always known quite quickly who I really like, as in starting to fall in love with, and who are just the nice people the hang with. And you can't make the other one the other however you turn your thoughts and give logical explanations.

    Good luck!

  7. Rogue, in terms of my feelings, I would like to be polyamorous at this point. So really liking three women is no contradiction. I'm monogamous by religion not nature.

    Thanks for the good luck wishes!

  8. May I say I find it completely hilarious that my lack-of-religion gives me permission to do anything I want short of the hurtful/unethical sexually, whereas my nature makes me want to only focus on one person at a time and quite possibly one person forever? Green grass is tough to find, it seems.

    Anyway I cannot quite relate to your problem as I would have collapsed in emotional exhaustion months ago. The only thing I can say is that being a good person is far from enough for long-term compatibility, which you already know; given that a sexual test-drive is not an option for you, I'd be leaning toward whoever of the three makes the best friend. Sexual passion ebbs and flows in a marriage (only problem there is when it's all neverending ebb), and it's simple friendship that maintains the tie. I've known marriages too that were frankly only friendships and this isn't what you want either, but it sure has hell beats someone you don't even want to play Settlers of Cataan with during an ebb.

  9. LabRat, I find the whole thing pretty hilarious too sometimes. Also, sometimes I look at the stuff my poly friends go through, and think I'd decide to be monogamous anyway.

    Another thing I want to look for is who makes the best ally. Who do I want at my side in a recession, or the Zombie Apocalypse?